Part 1: The Basics

What is your full name?
Joshua Beatrice Neils. I keep my middle name out of conversations since it's freaking Beatrice. So most people know me as Joshua B. Neils.

Where and when were you born?
I was born down in New Orleans. It was a little before 1982 hit, and I can remember my momma had this sling made out of scarves that put around her neck and carried me around with so she could keep her hands free.

Who are/were your parents?
My mother was a second generation immigrant, her mother was first gen. from Haiti. They were Vodun practitioners, my mother and her mother, so I grew up knowing the supernatural rather well. I read some of my mother's old texts about summoning and binding spirits from the books my mother managed to save from the flooding of our first house. My dad, I never met him while he was alive and my mom told me that I was better off for it. I don't think she ever meant for me to find the letters he sent her. He asked how I was doing, whether New Orleans was treating me good, he kept sending child support up until he died. When I left home for the last time I tracked down his grave and had a heart to heart talk with him past the veil. He was a good man.

Do you have any siblings?
Yeah, she's dead now. SIDS hit her when we brought her home from the hospital and my mother couldn't bring her back. I've been too scared to try, it's not my place to mess with someone who went without a fight.

Where do you live now, and with whom?
I travel a lot, so I can't really stay in any one place. So the closest thing to a home that I have is my van. It's big, black, and comes with a mattress and icebox. What's not to love about it?

What is your occupation?
I help people. I help the dead with their problems. Sometimes I'll banish a wraith and sometimes I'll end up placating a ghost and letting it move on. Working with dead people is a delicate business. If they're only a few decades old then it's easy to talk to them, get to know why they need before they'll move on and give it to them. Sometimes though, a spirit will stay back because of reasons that I'd rather not indulge or a spirit will stay back long enough to lose sight of its original goal and become a twisted caricature of itself, always dangerous to have around. That's when I whip out my banishing stick and get to work.

Write a full physical description of yourself.
Alright, why not? I'm six foot and two inches last time I measured, I'm a fairly skinny guy at around 150-160 pounds if I'm wearing a heavy jacket and I'm sopping wet. I usually do have a heavy jacket on though, even when I'm not sopping wet. I'm of Haitian ancestry, and I've got a bit of muscle on me I guess. My hair is black and I keep it trimmed, it's usually kept at a buzz and I've been trying to grow a goatee along with it. I've kind of got a billy goat thing going on on my chin though. My eyes are brown and I've got some really thin eyelashes on 'em. My nose is kind of big and I'm a bit embarrassed about it, but it's nothing too big for me to get self conscious about.

To which social class do you belong?
I guess that if you went by the amount of money I make I'd be somewhere in the lower class, but I travel around too much for something like that to matter to me.

Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
Yeah, I'm allergic to shellfish. Normally I don't really mind, shellfish isn't all that tasty anyway.

Are you right- or left-handed?
I'm a lefty.

What do you have in your pockets?
Oh, right now? I've got... my handy-dandy ghost whacking stick, it's kind of sticking out a bit. My wallet and all the money/credit cards therein, three silver needles I need for a ritual later, a sharpie, and a receipt for some diet Dr. Pepper and Sun Chips.

Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?
Yeah, sometimes I'll lapse into a french accent if I'm drunk, tired, angry, or I just lose control of myself in any way. I think I picked it up from my mom. we'd always speak french around the house, and I still remember some of it. It's a bit broken though.

Part 2: Growing Up

How would you describe your childhood in general?
I can't really describe my childhood in conventional terms. I mean, it was kind of trippy. When my cat ,Sparta ,died I buried her outside of my window and one night I woke up to meowing and clawing at the window, I looked outside and I say, clear as day, my cat staring at me through the glass. I opened it and she jumped in and made a bee-line towards her kittens. She stuck around a few days afterwards, just to make sure that they were okay, and then she disappeared. My entire childhood was something like that, finding the recently dead and talking to them. I think I had more dead friends than I did the mortal kind. It was an alright childhood for a black kid living close enough to the bad parts of town that he could hear gunshots every night.

What is your earliest memory?
Shitting myself.

How much schooling have you had?
I made it out of high school with a fairly comprehensive base of knowledge, I've added to it with my own research but I never really saw the point of going to college in my line of work.

Did you enjoy school?
Not particularly. It was okay in some parts, sucked in others, never really had that many friends at school but most of the teachers didn't mind my quiet ass sitting in the back of the class.

Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?
Practice, the majority of the time. I've always learned better by doing than by sitting in a classroom pouring over textbooks and writing up theses about what I read, plus what I do doesn't have that many textbooks in the first place, and the textbooks it does have are all written in blood on human flesh. So I carved my ghost-smacking stick myself and I put the runes on it with my own carving knife and I learned how to write runes on myself without blowing chunks of my ectoplasm into the mesosphere.

While growing up, did you have any role models?
Uh, yeah I looked up to the usual people little kids look up to, Batman, Superman, your occasional football player and the rest. I never really looked to other people for inspiration. Still, I guess I was influenced by a lot of the old knights riding horses into battle and winning the hearts of fair maidens kind of story and I guess I try to act like that usually.

While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
I grew up with my my mom and my auntie, both of them are dead now and I guess I avoided talking to them until they'd passed on. Me and my mom were never on the best of terms since I didn't follow her religiously. Me and my auntie were never close because my auntie resented having to take care of her freeloading sister and might-be-mentally-handicapped son. I spent most of my time either wandering around the neighborhood and talking to dead people. Considering the sort of place we lived in, I had a lot of dead people to talk to.

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I never thought that I could reasonably survive doing what I do today, so I mainly thought that I would be a police officer and that I would use ghosts to help me solve crimes. I know it sounds like the premise for a really Adult Swim show but I was a little kid so cut me some slack.

When and with whom was your first kiss?
Getting a bit personal huh? I guess my first kiss that was romantically charged was in fifth grade when I was... you know what I don't even know why I'm telling you this, next question!

Are you a virgin?
No. Fuck you.

If you have supernatural abilities, explain how you got them.
Well, I guess it's my mom's fault. I mean I don't want to make it out like I blame her or anything but she was the one who tried to bind one of the Loa. She should have known better, because Vodun only scratches the surface of the spirit world. She had no way to know what would would happen, Papa Legba is a stronger spirit than she would have admitted and it sort of, lashed out when he came to. Spiritual energy rose from the verve she used to summon him and lashed out at us. I was in school at the time, but his attack shook through the gene lines, not the physical ones. My mom went lame after that hit, never walked again. I...got the power to see dead people. Yeah, pretty unfair for her...

Part 3: Past Influences

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
I think getting the ability to see dead people ranks as pretty important for me. I don't want to be completely defined by that one event in my life though. I've seen people like that, something supernatural happens to them and it just sucks all the personality out them. They turn into nothing more than their powers, it's kind of scary. I don't want to end up that way, so I have to say that the most important moment in my life was visiting my dad at his grave and pulling his soul from behind the veil. It... mellowed me out I guess. I was a bit of an asshole before that, talking to him kind of set me straight. Or on the way to becoming straight anyway.

Who has had the most influence on you?
My dad, probably. I'm not really sure.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
I'd have to say it was in one of those small towns in Colorado, I helped fight back against a Räsvelg that was eating the souls of the city. When I showed up, the only spiritual reverberation I could sense were from the city itself. When I left, it was almost exactly the same, since I stayed for almost a year cleaning up the detritus that its death had caused spiritually.

What is your greatest regret?
I never got to talk to my dad before he died.

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
I....I....Once, this woman had died and was trying to protect her child. Her child was twenty-seven though, and she was a bit controlling. She was about to kill his girlfriend and I slammed her with a reverse invocation rune. I hit her a bit too hard with it though, and I destroyed her ghost. It took me a few months afterward before I was willing to use runes again.

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
Yes.

When was the time you were the most frightened?
When I was fighting the Räsvelg, it was the most horrifying creature I had ever seen in my life. There was something wrong with it, it wasn't supposed to be this way. It shook me up real bad.

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
I guess, my mom wouldn't have been crippled from the binding attempt. Yeah, that'd be it.

Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions

Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
A little of both? I mean, isn't everyone? Still, if I had to pick one I'd say I was mostly optimistic.

What is your greatest fear?
Being eaten alive. It's a niche fear I know, but it's still something that really creeps me out.

What are your religious views?
I don't think I have any. I know that seems odd coming from a guy who routinely deals with the dead but you have to understand something. I make bargains with Voodoo spirits while protecting myself with Norse runes so I can send Abrahamic ghosts to an-as-of-yet undefined resting place. I don't feel like figuring all that mess out, so I steer clear of it.

What are your political views?
Don't really have any. Does don't be an asshole count?

What are your views on sex?
It's fun, it relieves stress, it's sometimes necessary to placate some Loa, and you should always use protection.

Are you able to kill?
Uh, yeah. Yeah, I am. I've done it before, it's not something I like doing.

In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
Trap a spirit. Just, ugh. Watching them slaving away for some asshole while their humanity fades away pisses me off.

Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
Not entirely, no. I do believe in the existence of spells that can make you believe in soul mates and/or true love though, and that's bad enough without the real thing.

What do you believe makes a successful life?
Being able to go an entire week without once contemplating thoughts of suicide.

How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings?
I'm not really guarded about my feelings, but I'm not the sort of person who ends up spilling everything about themselves either. I guess I fall somewhere in the middle, erring more towards the side of silence.

Do you have any biases or prejudices?
Not really. I guess I'm just a surprisingly nice guy.

Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances?
See my answer for the evilest thing a human being could do.

Who or what, if anything, would you die for
I travel a lot, and I don't make that many connections so there's not that many people I can say I would die for. One of the benefits to living on the road I guess.

Part 5: Likes And Dislikes

What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
I like hiking, camping, I used to play the slap bass but I'm a bit rusty nowadays. I'm also a bit of an alcohol connoisseur, out of necessity since I routinely deal with the Loa.

What is your most treasured possession?
My mom had this bottle of rum she kept hidden for special events, she only ever used it once and it was a big bottle so I still have about half of it left. I don't drink it unless it's something important and I need some spiritual help.

What is your favorite color?
Grey.

What is your favorite food?
Chili. The kind that's been suffocated in hot sauce.

What, if anything, do you like to read?
Old books, the mythological and the simply occult. I also read lots of fantasy, but fantasy hasn't saved my life on several occasions.

Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
Yes, I drink and I've smoked a bit in the past. I quit smoking but I still regularly drink when the occasion calls for it.

How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
Working on a case. Yeah, I'm a bit of a workaholic but I tend to stick around after I solve a case and relax a bit before moving to another town.

What makes you laugh?
Funny things. My sense of humor is a bit dark, but I'm not the sort of person to makes 9-11 jokes or anything like that.

What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
Racism. True and honest racism just pisses me off. I don't think I really need to tell you why this pisses me off.

What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?
Work on more ghost cases. Which would generally just be me calling up old contacts and trying to seal up old ghosts so I can send them off.

How do you deal with stress?
Don't talk about it. Squirrel it away until it's gone from your mind.

Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
Probably the first one. I usually rely on quick wits and fast thinking to save me from angry ghosts and angry people.

What are your pet peeves?
That sound paper makes when you rub it against another sheet of paper.

Part 6: Self Images And Etc.

Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?
Haha, I don't even have a routine to disrupt. Still, whenever I can't help a ghost out it's a bit disheartening.

What is your greatest strength as a person?
I'm willing to do a lot for my friends. Most of them mean more than my own life to me. I don't have many friends thankfully.

What is your greatest weakness?
Joshua's greatest weakness is that he cares more for the deceased than he does the living. He doesn't know this however, and that is why this section is in third person.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I'd find it easier to talk to people, I'm a bit awkward around actual human people, most ghosts are more...vibrant ironically. There's something about dying that distills you to the very base elements of your personality. Dead people are so much more people than normal people are.

Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
An introvert. My thoughts are mine, not yours.

Are you generally organized or messy?
I leave hotel rooms escorted by Hazmat squadrons.

Do you like yourself?
Damn. That's a pretty deep question. I...guess? I mean, everyone's got little things about themselves they don't like but I don't contemplate suicide every week so I think I like myself.

What are your reasons for being an adventurer? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public?
An adventurer? That's not the word I would use to describe myself. I prefer magical detective. I do this because I would do it even if I didn't want to. Being able to interact with ghosts means that they can interact with you, and to them I usually shine like a light house in pitch. Secondly, I feel this obligation to help them. They're the underdog in this situation, who doesn't like an underdog?

What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?
Find more people like me. Maybe train them or get training from them. You get lonely from this stuff sometimes.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Right now? I see myself sitting here still answering your questions.

If you could choose, how would you want to die?
I'd want to go out I'd do it in a big blaze of glory. No quiet death for me.

If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.
1) Get laid.
2) Drive a car off a cliff
3) Kill someone who deserved it.

What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?
Not dying.